So I'm doing this thing...

The SXinney challenge.

Some Liv (the company I work for) distributors started this challenge on January 4th to help people be held accountable for their resolutions.

so I joined...

I thought, "why not?"
I keep telling myself I need to be more dedicated and want the motivation but haven't found it on my own. I go to the gym almost every day, but haven't gotten into a "routine" or something to push myself. You know, I do the elliptical for 20 minutes and go home and stretch. I have weights by my desk (at home) and I will lift weights but that's about it.

So I weighed in, sent in my measurements and before pics.
I've been going longer and harder at the gym, and I just started Jillian Micheal's 30 day shred.
I really enjoyed it. (I've done it once.) It was challenging. And as someone else described it, "That soggy sweat means you're working hard" Thanks for the encouragement.

I have changed my diet and I lost 15 pounds.
Ben and I are both vegetarians and we really try to eat a lot of fresh (as in fresh. not frozen or canned) veggies and fruits. But I still love those carbs and sweets. So I am trying to train my emotions and my cravings to be ok with only having one bite, being done, and being ok with that.

I am free to be healthy and comfortable with my body and eating habits.

New Year. New Thinking. Fresh start.

Since moving to California I think I have begun to battle with depression of some sort. Don't get me wrong, I love it here! But I'm alone most of the day. I work from home and don't have a lot of human contact. And when B is in school I have LESS human contact....needless to say I am lonely.

I have caught myself saying phrases like "I don't have friends in San Diego." or "I'm lonely" (please see above) and the list of self pity goes on and on. And I am quickly realizing that I am creating this reality with my words (and my actions).

I say I don't have friends and the Universe says "your wish is my command". I say I am lonely and the Universe says "your wish is my command". I am not walking my talk, and I forgot that my thoughts and words create my reality. So I am changing that!

I am reading a book by Pema Chödrön called "Comfortable with Uncertainty". Pema is a buddist nun and this book is based on 108 of her teachings from an interview (or seminar) she gave. She teaches about how you really can't change anything but yourself (duh! but I forget.) And if you take the pain of the world (But I like to think of just taking my own pain) and changing it into compassion for the world then it will make our world a better place. Meaning our reality. We create our reality.

She talks about Bodhichitta which in Sanskrit means "noble or awakened heart" and is equated with our ability to love. And each individual on this planet has this characteristic. I am beginning to understand if I can hold each person I come in contact with in that light, then I will be a happy person. Meaning, if I see everyone for the love that they truly are, it will then make my life more full of love and light.

B and I just watched "What the Bleep do we know". I had heard of it but never have seen it. I loved the way that they portrayed their message. I don't know if you have ever heard of the experiment that a Japanese man did with water. He took microscopic photos of water and for 24 hours put a negative word on the water and then another 24 hours he put a positive word.

Here he put "You make me sick. I want to kill you"

"Thank you"

"Love and Appreciation"

This was obviously an amazing study. What I took from "What the Bleep do we know" was obviously look what negative and positive words can do to water, but what does that mean negative and positive words are doing to me? The human body is 90% water.

I am the creator of my reality and happiness.

After reading this friend's blog, I get that I can't just change my way of thinking overnight, but I can make baby steps. She gave herself the goal of when she catches herself thinking negatively about herself, she then can only think positively about herself for 5 minutes. This is perfect. It's tangible and attainable.

And so it is. I am a good person. And I can be happy.

Christmas 09

I figured that I should make a Christmas post before I create a New Years post...Ya know, just to keep things "in order". My fam came down from Utah and spent a week with us for Christmas. It was so fun and relaxed. Of course we are a hoot together!

For some reason Ben thought they said "smile like your 5 years old".
We all went up to our friend Michele's house who lives in Escondido (30 minutes North and East from us). We had an AWESOME dinner (Jay made fish just for us!) and sat around the camp fire singing, Ben doing his funny impersonations (he was the star of the show!) and enjoying each others company.
Of course we didn't get any photos of us alll together... Bah!
So here are some of us in a couple of pictures...

The smoke made a cool effect on their skin.

Sadee loved playing with mom. Mostly because no one else will talk to her in doggy voice.

He's so sweet.
Too bad my super cute flower wasn't on the other side so you could see it.

John is such a stud. He's soo fun to hang out with.
He is growing out his goatee in honor of his friend who died. He's so cute!

K just sent me this photo from her phone. So one photo of MOST of us all together... This is in Ocean Beach by the OB Christmas Tree. All the locals kept told us that someone donates a tree every year and this one is the ugliest they have had.. haha

We took them up to La Jolla which is one of the most beautiful parts of San Diego. We are standing on caves that drop into the ocean and in the summer (when the waves aren't so violet) you can swim through them and go on kyak tour. Wayy cool! We are getting married just around the corner from here. It is absolutely beautiful!

For some reason this picture is cut off, but it isn't when I post it. annoying.
We headed up to Long Beach for the Christmas part of the trip. My Auntie Carolyn lives up there so we spent a lovely 4 day weekend up with her. She is the one who is teaching me all I know about photography (which isn't much) but she's the Master Sensai.

She also is a gourmet cook! Her specialty is what we call "Mexican night". She makes 3 types of meats (and mushrooms for us veggies!), 3 salsas, all the toppings you can imagine...and it's amazing! It's a tradition.

She gets more and more beautiful by the second. Bleh!

I colored her hair and put some awesome purple panels in. Then of course I had to put some in mine!!

Auntie Carolyn took some photos of us on the Long Beach pier, and she caught this handsome fella looking like a stud!

And of course the stud eats all day long! He's like a baby. On an afternoon at Seal Beach (5 minutes north of Long Beach) he had to get a taco at this lovely beach taco stand.

I wasn't hungry, either was John...but they gave Big B tostada sized ships that were quite tasty! There was one bench. And we snagged it.

John played su-chef all weekend and loved it! I'm sure CB loved it just as much!

Christmas day we headed to Venice for the afternoon and of course had soo much fun!
There are more photos but I haven't edited them and don't really feel like it. Buttt...we learned that Jim Morrison lived in an elavator shaft in an apartment right on the Venice boardwalk for 2 months without anyone knowing he was there and wrote most of the Doors' most popular songs. He later moved out into an apartment across the street. That apartment is now called the Morrison Apartments. And there are painted murals of him all around Venice (we only saw one...) Maybe I'll edit those sometime and get them up... if anyone's interested.

Anyway...

Merry Christmas from all of us!

December 14
Big B finished his first semester of law school today!!
Yippee!!
He feels really good about his finals and I already know he did great! He is a brilliant man and sometimes I have to say "Can you say that in non-lawyer terms?"
My cutsie little brain sometimes doesn't understand.

To celebrate we went here:
We have some veggie friends who told us about it.
This was our first time since being "veggies", trying a vegetarian restaurant.

And let me tell you that we LOVED IT!!
and really any dine out with him is enjoyable.

The restaurant was so cute and eclectic.
Of course we enjoyed our time in our own conversation, but also listening to the overly passionate man (who was on a date) talk to the hostess about diesel fuel and gasoline. Meanwhile his date was texting...

Of course like any great "one of a kind" restaurant, this was a "hole in the wall" one.
It was the only store on the longg street with lights on, and we were the only ones there (at 8pm) but were soon joined by the "regulars".

So if you'll excuse us, we are going to enjoy our veggie burgers now...

And here is to many more successful semesters of law school!

P.S. Don't let B get the "daily side salad" which turned out to be curried apple and potato salad.
You will be awakened in the middle of the night waving your hand in front of your face (in your sleep) by the dead cat fart smell.
During dinner he would take a bite and say "this is just to much. too much curry." while taking another bite...

December 12

merry christmas!
Love, Pumpkin Spice Latte

Today is a perfect day to blog. It is rainy and quiet. I time to reflect and remember.

November
I came home from Utah to a wonderful man and a bottle of this:

He surprised me with a bottle of one of my favorite wines.
He said "I was going to make you a huge sign but I couldn't find paper big enough, and then I remember that I have horrible hand writing".
A bottle of wine and yellow daisies are perfect, love!

December 28
The best Auntie let me borrow 2 lens' AND a tripod!!
I've had so much fun experimenting and playing.

I put up our Christmas tree and had a heyday with the tripod!


December 1
I decided to make my own Christmas cards this year.
I had a lot of fun painting and being creative. I've since made a total of 3 batches.
I can't get enough of it!

Somehow my ninja angel was the focus in the pictures and I didn't notice until after. haha

December 3
My brother made his way down to San Diego for a visit.
He refers to himself as a "street kid".
I learned the proper term while he was here. Never refer to a kid who travels the freight trains, and moves from city to city as "homeless".
What we know a "homeless" people are in fact "home bums": old, lazy people who stay in one place and don't do anything for themselves. (according to Rob)


I picked him up with his friend Boston, who is from Massachusets.
I learned what Mass-hole" means.
Sometimes from Massachusets. Brilliants. I know.

Robbie was trying to get rid of him and told him we could only give him a ride to Ocean Beach but he wasn't welcome to stay with us (me).
He takes things. Michele offered to give "them" (meaning Robbie) a pack for the dog and Boston's response was "Heyy cool thanks!" and picked it up for himself. I think he soon felt bad (and realized it wouldn't fit his dog) and gave it to Rob. I was glad! Or I would have whipped out my Mass-hole on him.

Boston giving a toast.

He liked to put his nasty beard in his mouth when he talked, he was very eager to tell us about all the women he has slept with on the streets, and their ages.

This amazing couple let Hank, Rob's dog stay with them. They have a yard and 2 other dogs and gave him a fun place to play. Even though he tore up their seat cushions that were out there...

December 4th

Robbie getting some much needed sewing in, with dental floss.
He sported Ben's Turkey Trot very well.

When I offered to wash his clothes, he refused.
For one, if washed they would either come out in scraps, or be close to it.
For two, "Stinkiness is good on the road, it gives you credibility".
Spoken from a true "street kid" himself.

We had some deep, heartfelt talks. Some that brought up a lot of emotions for me, and helped me understand him more.

December 5th

Looking exactly like Uncle Jack here in his new hat.
He was such a good sport in letting me take his picture and try new things out.


And 2 days later he was back on his journey.
I drove him 50 miles out side of San Diego to a rest stop so he could try and hitch a ride. I haven't heard from him and it's been raining, alot.

All I can do is send him love and angels.
This is his journey, not mine.

gratitude.

Ben and I started off our Thanksgiving running the Long Beach 5k Turkey Trot! I loved it!
The last 5k I ran was a year ago and I didn't prepare at all! (not a good idea)
After the run, my muscles froze up and I wasn't able to move or walk for a long time.

This time around, I decided to train and prepare.
Brilliant, I know.
I was running about 2.5 miles a couple of times a week but 2 weeks before the run I got a horrible cold and wasn't able to run because I couldn't breath.
And then I went to Utah for a week and didn't run at all there either.
Needless to say I was slightly worried about the Turkey Trot and didn't want to have the same results as I had before.
Surprisingly, it went really well!! We both ran most of it, and I think I ran it faster than the last! I'm feeling great and we had a fun time, and a great photographer to document!

Grateful for health and support.

Grateful for where we live.

We ran along the Long Beach boardwalk.

We spent out Thanksgiving with my Auntie Carolyn at Kate and Gabe's. Kate and my mom have been friends since high school!
It has been so enjoyable to get to know these people as an adult.

Grateful for family, friendship and music.

Carolyn and Kate sight reading a duet.

Grateful for celebration.

Thanksgiving day also happened to be on Sara's 25th Birthday!
I know it's out of focus, but I still love it.
My mom told me today that Kate told her she was pregnant with Sara when my mom was in labor with me at the hospital.

Grateful for companionship.
(These are the flowers he gave me when I got home from Utah)

Carolyn let me barrow 2 of her lenses AND a tripod.
So I've spend my Black Friday experimenting! :)

Grateful for girly, pretty things.

These are a few of my favorite things.

Grateful for over 2 wonderful years with him.

Grateful for exploring new ideas.

Grateful for all good things.

I'm going to attempt to make Thanksgiving dinner for me and Ben this weekend. I will document.