cleanse

I have this amazing lady in my life, Joline Wondergem. She's my amazing health mentor. She speaks my language. She has coached me through learning about my body, the foods I consume and why, and she has now taken me to a whole new level of health. Joline is a raw foodist and has taught me many of my now personal diet consumption. She's amazing. You can find her website here.

She recently suggested I do a really strict cleanse. You see, I have had rashes somewhere on my body my entire life. My mom called me "diaper rash queen" when I was a baby, as a teenager I had rashes under my eyes, behind my ears, between my fingers, my mission I had rashes between my toes (not athletes foot), and recently I've had a rash in the corner of my mouth and bottom lip for over 6 months now. And all of the listed rashes would stay for several months at a time. I just assumed I had overly sensitive skin. Which is still true, but my mentor suggested I try something new. The rash on my mouth had gotten to the point where it would split if I opened my mouth even the slightest, it would itch, get inflamed and take over my bottom lip. It got serious. I started to think that I was allergic to something because I did notice it would get inflamed with certain foods (wheat) but I wasn't convinced because I wasn't feeling sick.

My mentor thought I could possibly have candida, which is an overgrowth of yeast in the body. Not to get all medical on ya, but it basically causes the rashes, bloating, crankiness, hyperactive, craving for sweets (CHECK), excessive fatigue...etc. This made a light bulb go off in my brain. In looking at pictures on Google, my mouth looks the same as several other pictures.

So this is where I started the 15 day cleanse. NO fruit, NO wheat, NO sugar! These are what candida thrives on and also makes you crave these items. Obviously, everyone craves sugar and pasta. But I would have these weird cravings like I HAD to have it right then. Like someone who smoked "needed a cigarette" only, mine was "I need sugar. like NOW!" As J said "that's the candida talking".  Ekk I was nervous. The cleanse would alter everything. But I surprisingly did really well and felt AMAZING the entire time. Only a few times did I actually feel like I was cleansing. I was able to work out to my regular intensity (however I did leave a turbo kick class early because it was the most intense class I had been too, and I was cleansing). Along with the intense eating, I took these essential pills from doTerra, 3x a day. These were to help kill the candida.

What I ate daily: I juiced veggies every morning (because a smoothie was much harder to drink with no fruit). I juiced carrots, red/yellow peppers, cucumber, chard, kale, spinach, beet, cilantro and lime. I really started to enjoy it and continue to juice when I don't feel like a smoothie. I ate every 3 hours religiously (which I normally do) but if I didn't while cleansing I was starving, cranky, and tempted to eat something I shouldn't.

I ate pretty close to how I normally eat, I was just really strict on the 3 No's. For snacks I would eat my favorite brown rice tortilla with almond butter and maybe a handful of nuts. I made my regular brown rice bowls for dinner, or quinoa salad... all classic dishes of mine.

Although, my new favorite additions were the chia see pudding (for a treat) and homemade oatmeal with peacans and stevia (sometimes I would add some protein powder).

Chia seed pudding
grind in vitamix:
1/2 cup chia seeds (if you don't have a blender that will grind them, get already ground chia seeds)1/4 cup flax seed (I added these because I had it)
dump into bowl
Add 3 cups of almond milk to vitamix
Add chia seeds
couple drops of liquid stevia
I added raw coco powder
Blend
Pour into 3-4 cups and put in fridge

Anyway, my rash on my mouth started to clear up. It is no longer cracking which is HUGE! But I probably haven't killed the candida yet (if that is what I have). This will be a long process and will alter my eating habits. I will probably have to do the cleanse several times over the next few months. I'm in testing period to see how my body reacts to a little bit of wheat and sugar in my diet. Candida really plants itself well in your body, and sticks to your intestinal tract, so I will monitor my eating and how I feel.

But, I feel amazing! I feel so motivated now that I have a vision as to what I could be trying to get rid of. Next step is I'm going to take a food allergy test to see if that gives me any more answers. Another huge thing for me is that I seriously feel amazing in my skin, in my own body. I feel me. I feel comfortable. Before I was feeling blahh, sluggish and cranky. I'm still wearing the same size clothes, I am 5 pounds less which is amazing but doesn't change things drastically. and I feel like a new woman!

One more thing I've incorporated Lymphatic brushing. My friend told me her sister specializes in it and it has done amazing for her body. Check out her sister's instructions for a home brushing session. She lives in Utah and from what I hear, gives amazing Lymphatic massages to help move toxins out of the body. Her name is Bobbie, and I will definitely be seeing her when I'm in Utah next!

Thank you for all the support from friends and family, and especially to the husband who even did most of the cleanse with me. He's a good sport!

thoughts of our future

Today is Friday. I love Fridays. The closure of the week, the beginning of the weekend full of getting things done, grocery shopping (I actually enjoy it), getting my house organized and clean. I enjoy all of these things. I enjoy Fridays. Well, and on Saturday I'm getting my hair done. That makes for a great weekend!

This week I finished my semester. And one rough semester it was. Fights with an awful professor and stupid group projects. My group just happened to be one who wanted to meet every week for 5 weeks in a row to meet. WHY? there is no need. It was the easiest project. You interview a woman, then you present what she said. What is there to meet about more than once? Anyway... Closure.

So today I've been thinking about our future. We were talking about the possibility of a graduation trip. He graduates in December 2012, I'll graduate in May 2013. If we could swing it, I'd love a week (two if possible) in Paris. What better way to celebrate graduation than with The Louvre, Notre Dame Cathedral and pastries? I know, I couldn't think of anything better.
Well, second best would be a Mediterranean cruise. We were looking on vactionstogo.com, and you can go on a cruise through Italy and Greece for $500-1000 a person. Depending on length and time of year. Amazing!

We also were dreaming about the first home we'll buy. What started this conversation? Oh talking about having counter space that won't be packed full of juicers, vitamix, protein powder...all because there is no storage in our kitchen. I want counters that are clear of clutter where I can have cute glass jars full of oatmeal, flax seed and quinoa. Ya know, the stuff I use every day, but I pull it out of a tupperware from the cupboard.

Then I started imagining hardwood floors with a nice shag carpet and a coffee table and a washer and dryer in my apartment. You mean I wouldn't have to put quarters in to operate it?

My favorite comment from B today.
B: "We will have a moderate home so we can go on nice trips and take our kids to the beach"
J: "We live by the beach"
B: "That means our kids will go pretty damn often"

haha he's darling and makes me laugh.

new art...

I had a need for something new in my house. My facebook friend Pixie was having a special and I jumped right on it when I saw her masterpieces. It makes me want to paint. I was inspired and felt peace and joy when I looked at her work.

Check out these amazing paintings I just bought!

Intuition Guides - Raven

For change and movement ahead, intuition guides the way.
Raven intelligently seeks his fortune methodically and playfully.
Use creative means to determine what is next. Know what you need.

Warrior - Great Horned Owl

Owl as Warrior is best expressed by Great Horned Owl.
Fierce and feared, he can be called in for any task requiring resolution,
to hold the front lines. Great Horned Owl sees straight through
to the core of imbalance, revealing the root of the conflict,
as well as how to solve it. He understands how to implement the
changes needed to bring about fruition.

Once he has successfully overcome his issue,
he takes graceful flight toward the moon,
bringing the feminine energies back,
to balance the exertion of masculine energies
needed to fight the intense battle.
The medicine of Great Horned Owl is to wage war
only when absolutely necessary: for survival of the soul and it's purpose.
He effectively releases the ties that bind.
Call upon Great Horned Owl when standing up to the disparaging voices within or
to fight for a worthy cause dear to your heart.

Her descriptions are so perfect and I resonated with them for gifts for friends. I won't say who so they are still surprises, but I got one for them and one of each for myself. What a gift!

If you're interested in her work, her shop is here.

Enjoy!

grateful for the Mr.

yes, it's one of those posts.

I was just in my home state for a total of 48 hours. I was grateful to see my family, spend time telling stories and laughing, but there is always something missing.

The Mr.

He rarely comes because of school
and he's allergic to the Mama's puppies

We are both rather independent people, rarely talk on the phone when I'm gone because he is normally locked inside the library, or I'm on the go until after he goes to bed. So we text the entire trip, or text when he isn't studying.

But coming home to him is such a dream.
I had driven home from Long Beach (1.5 hours) and didn't even go home before I stopped at Costco and the Mexican Market for our weekly grocery shopping because I knew I wouldn't be able to do it any other time. I just kept telling myself "as soon as I finish shopping, I can go home and shower and get in bed". This is at 2pm, mind you. I knew the Mr. wouldn't be home until 6 or 7, so after I got home, put the groceries away and showered, I put myself to bed with my laptop to watch some shows and relax. My favorite activity after an eventful weekend in Utah, followed by a 12 hour car ride.

B got home at 8, and I felt this surge of energy, breath of fresh air. I finally get to see him. That is the best feeling and yet there are no words to describe finally seeing your husband after a short trip, and yet it felt like it was forever.

This is a sappy post.
get over it.
I feel grateful.

On another note, I was reminded during my trip to Utah, that everything is perfect.
And yes, everything is perfect.

today....

I want a sewing machine. I want to make pillow cases and curtains and little girl dresses and take pictures of the little girl in the little girl dresses. and I want to make pillow cases with flowers that are a soft white with big mustard yellow flowers and paint my walls.

I'm becoming that woman
what am I going to do with myself?

{almost} figuring it out

I sometimes feel like I'm still figuring out who I am.

maybe it's a life long process and I didn't realize it before

Sometimes I dream about living in a little cottage where I can have a garden, field, paint my walls a different color every month...allow my inner hippie to come out.

Then sometimes I want to live in the city where I can shop at MAC and Nordy's all the time and occasionally go dancing....

Maybe I want something in-between. A darling little house in the suburbs, with beautiful grass and trees, a garden with tomatoes, zucchini, carrots...and I can paint the walls every month if I want to (although, if you know me. I won't. I think of a project, start it and it is too big to finish. so maybe I'll paint once). And I'm go running with my twin baby stroller through the neighborhood.

I feel like I'm having an identity crisis. I'm loving school, but what do I want to do after? I DON'T KNOW! I want to have a baby(ies) soon, but part of me feels so cliche and something I never said I would do; having a baby right after I graduate. But by then I will be nearly 30, and my baby monitor is screaming!

I'm just me. not just as in JUST, but that's all I can be. Some days I'm a hippie, some days I'm girly and prissy. And everyday, I'm ME, no matter what.

I think I feel like I'm having a 27 year old midlife crisis. The husband and I do the same thing every day. We go to school, work, homework, if we're lucky enough to have dinner, together, homework, watch a tv show, go to bed...start all over again. We both are feeling tired. Tired of school, and ready for it to be over. And yet at the same time I want to cherish this time and enjoy it. Sounds like a double negative.

I have dreams of being at home with my {twin} babies, focusing only on them, holding both in my arms, blogging about them, taking pictures of them. Then I think, am I ok with being a full time mom? I want to be, but I guess I always told myself that was bad. Women are to have careers, be successful, have foundations....I guess I can do all of that still.

I guess I'm struggling with who I am as a feminist. I've learned all these new ideas, and I agree with a lot of them. Is it bad that I want my man to take care of me? That's so non-feminist.

like I said, {almost} figuring it out.

these are the things going through my head right now.
oh, and I'm obsessed with twins right now. I just have that feeling.

I'm grateful in my confusion.

I dream...

lately I've been dreaming a lot about:

after I graduate from school....will I go on to get a masters? In what? Do I really want to? IN WHAT?

when B graduates....then what? He's going to be a LAWYER. Like a real one. That doesn't seem real.

when we decide to have children. Will that ever come? Can I do it? All I read/hear about are sleepless nights, cranky babies, cranky mommies. Am I up for the challenge? Can I do it?

being a really good photographer. I don't want to be mediocre. I want to really be good and know what I'm doing instead of pretending.

photographing my children. See? there I go again with this baby stuff. I want a baby to photograph. There is a baby who lives below us. The parents are quite shy and rarely talk. Even if I talk to them. I can hear their baby voices and happy baby laughs all day long. I love it. I want to knock on their door and say "hi. I know you don't know me. but can I snuggle your baby for a bit and take pictures of her? Thanks!"

do I get a masters first or have a baby? if I have a baby will I get a masters? If I get a masters will I have a baby?

oh, and dreaming about the cruise we just booked for our 1st anniversary! I'm already planning the swimsuits and cute cover ups...

I think about all the wonderful things we're doing in our lives right now and I know we couldn't do them with a baby. I am really understanding that I was programmed that I have to have a baby right after I get married. Obviously, I don't like following the norm, hence where I am in my life right now. So for now, it's perfect that I don't have a baby right now. But that doesn't make me googoo gaagaa over them.

so for right now. I'm grateful for where I am in my life. Everything is perfect.